Updated: Jun 5
The times they are a’ changing’. No longer are we bound to centuries-old traditions and strictly enforced gendered distinctions. There is more freedom than ever before to create a wedding that suits your world, not the world of yesteryear. If you’re at the vanguard of this movement then you might have been invited to be the best woman at your friend's wedding. Call yourself whatever rings true, but female best man might not be a bad place to start!
Speaking of starting - where do you start when it comes to your female best man speech? Here might not be a bad place to begin. We have a few tips to make your speech the standard of a brand new tradition! Keen? Let’s dive in.
Five Ways to Give the Female Best Man Speech of Your Dreams
1. Don’t Ditch All Traditions
We are the first to cheer on the trailblazers among us. But some traditions have their place. That is especially true when it comes to speech etiquette. You want to be gracious and polite, and extend gratitude to those who came together for your friend’s wedding. Politeness never goes out of style.
2. Create a Well Rounded Speech for a Well Rounded Person
The groom is not one-dimensional- your speech shouldn’t be either. Imagine you are writing out a character sketch for a book or film - you want your character to be represented in all their multifaceted glory. Well, the groom is the hero of this story and you want to give him the epic narrative he deserves. Touch on his different qualities and achievements and give everyone a closer look into his depth and dynamism.
3. Revel in the Novelty
I think we can all agree that a female best man is still not the norm at most weddings - but that can be a good thing where your speech is concerned! Play up the novelty and poke fun at traditions or make light of your unconventional role! Lean into the role by making jokes, dishing up some sass or witty idioms. A few well-timed digs at the groomsmen will get the crowd laughing, for instance.
4. Anecdotes = Your Best Friend
When it comes to a female best man speech, you’ll run up against inevitable time constraints. You might not have enough time to share a sweeping, multi-part epic about your friend’s life and times. But you can still create a punchy, riveting speech that hits on major themes of his life by leveraging anecdotes. Distil the beautiful memories and misadventures into a few wisely chosen bite-sized tales.
5. Shower the Bride with Attention
While you don’t have to lavish her with repetitive praise, a few sincere comments, and recognition of her role in your friends life is good form. Incorporate her into an anecdote if it fits, or save a few genuine, incisive compliments for the end of the speech. This is a “greatest hits” of his life after all, and she is certainly one of them!
Pressure Getting to You?
We’ve got mad respect for your role - you are not only blazing a new path, but you’re getting up in front of a crowd of people and spilling your heart out while at it. It can be exhilarating, true, but it can also be terrifying. If you’ve got preemptive stage fright we at Splendid Speeches can tackle that with you head on and help you write the speech of your dreams.